Micheál Martin TD, Leader of Fianna Fail has welcomed confirmation that British Head of State Queen Elizabeth II will make an official State Visit to Ireland this year.
He commented, "I'm delighted shes coming. Alot of us in Fianna Fail lost our jobs in the recent election, and to be frank, we're looking for work. Now I'm not saying we are prepared to betray our nation, but if the Queen is looking for any information about Ireland's security or anything that she feels might be an advantage to England if they decide to invade again, I'm prepared to talk. Now I'm no traitor, so ill need to be confirmed as a British citizen first, and given at least a barony. Also if I could get Biffo, Dick Roche and Conor Lenihan knighted, it would be great."
"Britain is our nearest neighbour, and its been a long term belief of the Fianna Fail leadership that they should invade us and pacify the natives. A good pitchcapping would do the likes of David McWilliams and Michael O Leary good. Only last week, Mary Coughlan said to me that a Union Jack hanging over the GPO would be good for Irish tourism. I ready to state on record that Fianna fail are prepared to fully collaborate and aid any planned English invasion of Ireland. Ill personally cut our telephone wires, dig up the railway lines and drop a six inch block on Kevin Doyles right foot to help out. In closing, Cead Mile Failte Lizzy."